I didn't fully grasp the depth of a mother's love until I stood over my sick child in his hospital bed.
Our firstborn was a perfectly healthy 7 lb, 6 oz baby boy. We brought him home from the hospital two days later. The next morning we received a phone call from our pediatrician. His blood test had come back abnormal, and we were told to rush him to Children's Hospital.
My head was spinning. I just couldn't understand. He looked fine, but over the next 12 hours as we sat in the ER, he became lethargic and refused to eat. He was admitted to the hospital for observation and IV fluids.
During the night his monitors started beeping frantically and nurses rushed into our room. They swept him away, leaving my husband and I alone and completely in shock.
We had so many questions and no one had answers.
I locked myself in the bathroom and just sobbed. Was our baby gone forever? I felt completely helpless.
We prayed through the night, but our words felt so empty. I watched the sun rise and hoped that it had all been a bad dream.
We were brought in to see him. His tiny frame covered in tubes and wires. His body was shutting down. His heart rate had dropped and he had moments when he stopped breathing.
He was then admitted to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit.
The NICU is a scary place. It is the reality of life and death on the most innocent little ones. It is a place where nothing seems fair. But it is also a place of miracles. A place you can be so thankful for and yet never want to see ever again.
Our baby boy was healed. He is now 8 years old and stands nearly as tall as me.
I don't know why the NICU was part of his story, our story, but he is a walking miracle. My heart goes out to all the mamas that are there and that is why I am so excited to share a new project with you.
NICU Daze written by my friend Elizabeth Norton and Megan Crume is a 30 day devotional for NICU families. It is written by two mothers who have been there and want to share their story in order to breathe a little peace and hope into the most hopeless of moments.
It also features my artwork on the cover! It is a drawing that I made during my first pregnancy and then had it sitting by our baby's bed in the NICU.