Monday, July 30, 2012

Morning Moments

It's 5:30 am.  The sun is just starting to brighten the sky.  I can see the color of morning peeking through my bedroom curtains as I pull myself out of bed.

It is a rare moment when my house is quiet.  I tie on my sneakers, kiss my sleeping husband goodbye and head out the front door.

I'm not a runner, but I pretend to be.

I don't know what sparked me to take this up now.  I was the girl who tried to hide in the bathroom on Mile Run Day in gym class.  But here I am, a 30 year old mother of 6, getting up with the run.

I hop off the last step, breathe in the clean morning air and try to keep up a good pace.  I'm not impressed with myself.  The road feels so much longer than it looks.  But it feels good to sweat, to feel alive.

I drag myself back up the steps and sneak into that still sleeping house.  No one even noticed I was gone.  No one waiting to cheer me on.  My legs are weak and I'm out of breath, but it's a beautiful pain.

I shower and dress and start my coffee.  I wrap my hands around my mug and take a seat on the front step.  I soak in the moment.  The birdsongs are filling the air.  Dew drops are sparkling on the grass and lining a spider's web.  My Bible lays open on my knees and I pray for strength for the day.

This moment is pure peace.

I take a walk around my yard.  I look for new blooms on my plants and pull a few weeds.  I say good morning to the chickens.

My coffee mug is empty and I walk back inside just as the children are starting to stir.

Within minutes this quiet house erupts with energy.  6 little ones are recharged and calling for me.  My husband's alarm clock is screaming.  I'm making breakfast and filling bellies.

My moment is gone...but I carry the peace with me.

Linking up with Lydia!

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Pulling Weeds

I was inspired by reading Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts to start my own list of simple blessings.  As I was reading over my list I found that I had written a particular blessing 3 separate times.

In this list full of beautiful things and treasured moments, there 3 times I had been so moved that I wrote "pulling weeds" in my thanksgiving journal.

I'm sure most gardener's would not count their weeds as a blessing.  My flowerbed is cluttered with them and they grow more abundant that anything else in my yard.

Pulling the weeds has been a huge job, but it is a gift.

I love those moments where I stand bent over my garden, face flushed and dripping in sweat from the Summer sun.  Dirt under my fingernails and between my toes.  My hands are busy picking and choosing which plants will stay and which must go.

I take out my frustrations on those weeds.  It gives me time to think, or maybe not think, if that's what I really need.

By pulling out what's not necessary I'm leaving behind only the beauty.

And there is the blessing.

My little garden is so bare.  I don't know what I am doing.
I am a complete beginner and maybe that's why I find so much joy in each new feels like a little victory, a plant that I didn't kill.

When I pull the weeds I can see all my little victories in full bloom.

Now if only I could pull all the weeds in my life.  All the ugliness that is hiding the beauty.  All the clutter that keeps me from growing.  All the lies and hurts that hide the sunshine...

God is the perfect gardener.  He doesn't get tired.  He doesn't forget to water.  He is there ever watching and waiting  to nurture me.  He has a beautiful plan for me and knows what I need to grow.  Sometimes it means pulling some weeds.
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